When people leave... for good.
1:42 PMOh no... I just read about this in a friend's tweet (which was 12 hours ago). You see, I was a student assistant for three years and stopped when I was in fourth year. I worked with Kuya Arnel in the administration's office of our college. I think I still saw him a few weeks ago (not that long actually) when I enrolled for this semester.
Whenever someone else dies (anyone close or not to me), the feeling is always the same. The feeling of loss... It's the experience last March 29, 2005 when my Kuya Karlos didn't come home from a party.
My brother left in such a surprise. Last saw him during dinner before he went to a friend's graduation celebration. Despite him leaving in an instant, his departure seemed forever. We didn't lose him all at once. We lost him little by little as the years pass.
It was like losing in touch with someone. It starts with you barely see each other, text exchanges start to dwindle, mails just stop arriving until one day you realize that the person isn't a part of your life anymore.
Physically, they aren't but spiritually they will always be. When you've moved on, one day the tears just stop falling and thoughts of them begin to make you happy rather than depressed. Whenever I enter his room and see all his things (clothes, shoes, pictures), his presence, his scent still remain.
My mom would always tell me, my Kuya lives in my heart. And we should just think that he's just abroad, traveling, enjoying the view and having fun.
I extend my condolences to Kuya Arnel's family. I understand what its like. Been there. I will pray for his soul and his family. Please do too.
R.I.P. Kuya Arnel.
Whenever someone else dies (anyone close or not to me), the feeling is always the same. The feeling of loss... It's the experience last March 29, 2005 when my Kuya Karlos didn't come home from a party.
My brother left in such a surprise. Last saw him during dinner before he went to a friend's graduation celebration. Despite him leaving in an instant, his departure seemed forever. We didn't lose him all at once. We lost him little by little as the years pass.
It was like losing in touch with someone. It starts with you barely see each other, text exchanges start to dwindle, mails just stop arriving until one day you realize that the person isn't a part of your life anymore.
Physically, they aren't but spiritually they will always be. When you've moved on, one day the tears just stop falling and thoughts of them begin to make you happy rather than depressed. Whenever I enter his room and see all his things (clothes, shoes, pictures), his presence, his scent still remain.
My mom would always tell me, my Kuya lives in my heart. And we should just think that he's just abroad, traveling, enjoying the view and having fun.
I extend my condolences to Kuya Arnel's family. I understand what its like. Been there. I will pray for his soul and his family. Please do too.
R.I.P. Kuya Arnel.
4 comments
i am so sorry:( my condolances
ReplyDeletexx
You are really strong to be able to share your experiences like this. I'm sorry that happened to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI really admire and respect that you have gone through things like that and still remain such a positive force, Melai.
Hi Mel and B :)
ReplyDeleteDon't be sorry. It's okay. I'm okay. :) I also appreciate that you think I remain a positive force. (Thank you ^_^)
Things like this really happen. The only thing we know for sure about our lives is that we will die in the future. We don't know when. But that's for sure.
So I have lived accepting the fact that death is just around. It your time when it's your time. So I do nothing but live and hope I'd leave something behind.
^__^
Melai, you are so sweet. Napansin ko lang green and pink ka rin pala? It's the color of my life too! My friends make fun of my pink-green craze by saying im too greenwich. lol. but what the hell right? they just look sooo cute together :)
ReplyDeleteI appreciate anything you have to say. Thanks for dropping by. It means so much to me. Love, Melai